I unscrew the cartridge holder
from the body of the pen
in order to load it.
I set the body aside;
—detached, it looks like
a mascara wand. You
-Tube cleans the rubber stopper
on the Follistim cartridge
with an alcohol swab
and then inserts it,
getting ahead with every step,
a fast walker, my mind buffering
always. More steps,
until the pen is loaded.
—I tap the cartridge and a tear swells
at the tip of the needle, ready to burst.
This releases air, ensuring
the right amount of dosage,
though there’s so much DIY in IVF
that we can’t be sure.
Beside herself, Amy watches.